stirring.

i have been trying to write this blog for over a week now.
but everytime i try...it just doesn't happen. maybe today is different.
you'll never know though. i may highlight and delete everything again.

as you all know from my previous post, sweet little josephine tested positive for HIV. since that post, she's been put on medication and has responded soooo well to them. what a blessing and a joy to hear. she's smile and laughing and seems to be in a lot less pain. her parents put up to videos of her today. though i know that many people enjoy watching them, those videos are extra special to me. for over almost 3 years now, i have known josie, played with josie, loved josie, prayed for josie, pleaded with God to do a good work in her body. the Mayernick's were a direct answer to my prayers. so thankful for them. every morning i wake up and check my blog roll...hoping they updated their blog with good news, pictures or stories. and what do you know! today i got a video. thank you Jesus.

so all that's gone on in the past week has really spurred my heart to prayer and thinking. in addition to all that my head is doing on it's own, my husbands jon foreman cd has been in the car and playing over and over. there is a certain song that i have been drawn to, listening to it over and over and over and over. it's called equally skilled. i was going to post lyrics but here is a link to the song [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=O0VsJKV6j6c]

it's not the direct message of the song but here is what i have been thinking.

God sets his people in families for a reason.
And when we treat our families without love and respect we take this GIFT for granted.
we almost cheapen the relationship.
[are you following?]

in the middle of the song are these lyrics:

The day of justice comes and is even now swiftly arriving
Don't trust anyone at all not your best friend or even your wife
For the son hates the father the daughter despises even her mother
Look! Your enemies are right, right in the room of your very household

this is what our society has done. we've cheapened the relationship. we've taken out of joy and blessing and trust of so many families and replaced it with hate and dishonesty and jealousy. but ohhhh look at the BEAUTY of what a family can really be. God calls himself Father. paints a pretty good picture of how God views family. it's important to Him. so important.

i am convicted of this when my ugly side comes out towards josh. i don't mean to be ugly but i let lies get in the way of truth and start to give in to my selfishness and stubbornness. it's not what my heart wants. i'm working on it. and lately, i have felt the depth of this truth that God has set me in a family for a reason. there is something special to be learned from it.

and then my mind goes on to this:

as a Believer and one who wants what the Father wants, what do i do about those without a family? what do i do about the fact that there are SO MANY people without a family around the world? there are many causes for a person not being in a true family relationship but my heart has been focusing on orphans. orphans. close to 147 million orphans in the world.

i know it's abrupt but all of a sudden, i don't feel like writing much more.

147 million. God is doing something.
My heart can't stop racing. He's moving.
Something is stirring.
Josh and I are praying.

Love to you all.